The Two Best Jobs I Almost Got (and wished I had)

American Greetings

The first best job I almost got was working as the creative director for American Greetings in Cleveland, Ohio. It was a perfect job for several reasons. To start, the people with whom I would have worked were intelligent and interesting. They were artists, writers, and cartoonists who designed and developed projects for a company that was part of American Greetings, the card company. They were the character licensing arm of the company and, of course, they were called "Those Characters from Cleveland." These were the people who created Ziggy and Holly Hobby, among others. Many of them had originally worked at Disney. My job would have been to be kind of a den mother and keep this bunch of crazies on track.

Another reason this job would have been great is because it was in Cleveland. Many people remember Cleveland being called the "Mistake on the Lake," but it is really quite nice with great museums, ethnic restaurants, and beautiful parks. Besides, my best friend from college lived there, so I would not have been alone in a new city.

Finally, applying for the job was the best job interview I've ever had. The company director came out with a cardboard box filled with stuffed toy animals all wearing rollerskates. These were a new line of characters called the "Getalong Gang" that the company was developing into a book, movie, and TV cartoon series. He gave me two weeks take the animals home and use them as charcters in a children's book. I wrote the book and turned it in, and I thought I had the job, but then the woman whose job it was decided not to leave. So American Greeting paid me $200 for the book. But I would have rather had the job!

Olympic Equestrian Team

The other job I wish I would have gotten was as the groom and exercise rider for a woman who was trying out for the U.S. Equestrian Team. Once again, this job had many features to recommend it. First, I would have gotten to ride her two horses which were top of the line jumpers who were each worth more than my house! I could never afford a horse of this quality, and the opportunity to ride and jump two of them was incredible.

Second, I would have had the chance to drive all over the country, hauling the horses to events on the Olympic circuit and watching all of the top riders compete for spots on the American Olympic team. The competitions were usually in big cities on the east and west coasts, so I would get to travel to interesting places and attend events for free when most people had to pay for tickets.

Third, Not only would I have had these great perks, but I would have been paid three times what I had been making in my previous job mucking out horse stalls, plus all my expenses, including food and hotels, would have been covered while we were on the road.

Actually, I got this job, but two days before we were due to leave, I was jumping my horse over a big fence, and I miscalculated the jump, causing my horse to get hung up in the fence and flip over. She wasn't hurt, but I broke my nose, jaw, and arm. I also had to have reconstructive surgery on my face, and I probably had a concussion; I was such a mess that I never noticed if my head hurt. Needless to say, I couldn't ride or drive a horse van after the . The horses and their owner left without me, and I spent the summer recuperating instead of traveling the Olympic equestrian circuit.